Put To The Test

In the post “The Attacks 6: White-Collar Crime” I quoted the following scripture:

Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, “VENGEANCE IS MINE, I WILL REPAY,” says the Lord.

BUT IF YOUR ENEMY IS HUNGRY, FEED HIM, AND IF HE IS THIRSTY, GIVE HIM A DRINK; FOR IN SO DOING YOU WILL HEAP BURNING COALS ON HIS HEAD.”

Saint Paul in Romans 12:19-20, quoting Proverbs 25:22

Unbeknown to me, matters were already in train that would put me to the test on that very issue.

I’d been hired by a woman living locally (whom I had never met), to install a membership site.  I worked on the job for almost 3 weeks. First of all I had to work through with her a complete redesign of the rather shoddy site she already had, with a lot of chopping and changing about how she wanted it to look.  Then out of the blue she reneged on the deal and said she had to go back to the friend who had been building it in the first place.  She had offered me $5000 to take on the job and she freely acknowledged that she owed me that money regardless, but said she was unable to pay until she got the site up and earning.

I very much doubted I’d recover the money or any part of it without a fight – which has proved to be correct.   Several people (Christian and otherwise) voiced their thoughts about taking her to the Small Claims Tribunal, and of course I knew all about that.   What’s more, I had a written acknowledgement from her that she had breached our contract.

I pondered on this for some days.  I was devastated, of course. – and the Devil kept kindly reminding me that I had probably been the subject of a behind-the-scenes hatchet job : something that really upset and rankled me.  On top of that came all the goads about needing to stand up for oneself and not be a wimp.

As I wandered around in this cloud of negativity, struggling with the Devil’s confusion tactics, I could only hold onto the Lord blindly for all I was worth, and keep affirming that despite appearances I knew He was working in the situation.   I kept on asking Him to show me what to do.

I have to say I got absolutely no peace until I made the decision to let the whole thing go, much as I needed the money.

On the day the decision was finally made I had to drive about 3 hours on business and I used the driving time to seek His presence.  I have never felt closer to Him than I did at that time.  Moreover, as the decision crystallized and I began to put the Devil behind me,  scriptures in support came flooding into my head – including the quote above.  This continued over a couple of days, with the rightness of the decision becoming more and more apparent as time passed.

It was made very clear that not only is there nowhere in scripture where the Lord tells us to pursue our debtors into the courts : such action is in breach of the words of the Lord’s own Prayer, “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.”   Ooops!  And the only time He is on record as mentioning the recovery of debt in court, He makes it plain such action is best avoided at all costs.

I was also granted a very powerful insight into how the Full Armor of God works.  Though some people tried to tell me that as a Christian I’d have its protection if I went ahead and pressed my claim, I was given a much deeper insight than that.  I was shown that the full armor of God works only when we are walking in the spirit and following God’s guidance. Suddenly the awareness came to me that the courts are Pharaoh’s system, and if I chose to use that, I would quite rightfully forfeit the benefit of God’s protecting armor.  How slippery is the slope we stand upon if we do not listen VERY CAREFULLY to what the Holy Spirit has to tell us, and really open our hearts to what the Lord wants us to learn!  How easy is it even for believers to be drawn astray and then wonder why God was not with them!

Once my decision was made, the peace of mind was mind-blowing.

Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  Matthew 11:29

I became humbly grateful for the whole awful experience, because I realised without question it had been one of the most valuable in my whole Christian walk to date, and I’d been given the opportunity to step up a notch in maturity and gain a new insight into the Lord and His ways.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.  For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
Isaiah 55:8-9.

I came out from that experience with the absolute conviction that what I had gained was worth far more than the $5000 I’d lost.  I am still of that view, nearly a year later, which is why I want to share this insight.

Hallelujah!

One other thing was made blindingly clear to me.  There are many people who read and quote scripture – it’s not that hard to do.  Where the difficulty can lie for all of us is to see the application of the Word to the events of OUR OWN lives, especially when we have vested interests at stake. It’s the mote and the beam …

Peace.

Patricia

PS:  Some months later, the Lord showed me that He had been working on my finances all along.  I am not out of the woods yet, but my greatest financial concern is being taken care of.  That is another story.